The in crowd

Top of the mornin' to you all. Do you know what I like about Wednesdays? Oh sure, there's the obligatory "hump day" reference, but that's not what I'm going for right now. Yeah, I know it was a character in The Addams Family, but that's not it either. I appreciate your guesses though. I like that it's one of the few words in our language that I can think of that feels British to me. You know, like "Liecester Square" being pronounced "Lester Square." I know back east does that with things like "Worchester" being "Wooster," but they speak all funny without additional help. Quite similarly, "Worcestershire sauce" looses at least a syllable somewhere in there. Wednesday and its "Whensday"or "Whendsday" pronunciation stand out to me for that reason, and I often like things that stand out. Except that one curl on my head. Sit down, already!

Oh yeah, there's one more thing I enjoy about Wednesday. Occasionally, when the planets and stars align in that magical way they sometimes do, I post a Wacky Wordy Wednesday thingamajig. Not a doohicky or thingamabob, mind you; just a thingamajig. Today is one of those sweet, sweet Wednesdays. Buckle up.

Several times throughout my life, I have had the following conversation with someone:

Me: Well, you know that 'flammable' and 'inflammable' mean the same thing, right?

Person Who Has Not Yet Learned To Trust Peter On Such Things: Huh?

Me: Yeah, they mean the same thing. Like 'duh' and 'no duh.'

PWHNYLTTPOST: No, no, 'inflammable' means it can't catch on fire.

Me: No, a lot of people make that mistake. You can look it up if you like, but they actually mean the same thing.

PWHNYLTTPOST: I just don't see how that's possible. Let's look it up.

Me: (smiling, knowing that another will soon realize the foolishness of ignoring my knowledge) Have at it.

Inevitably, this person finds that I was speaking the truth and says something to the effect of, "Wow, that's really weird. Why would they mean the same thing?" I will usually then remind them of the "duh/no duh" correlation from earlier in the conversation, and they begin to feel a wee bit humbled in my presence.

I don't know why those words are defined as they are. "In" is obviously a prefix that makes many words opposites, such as "visible" and "invisible." The thought of those meaning the same thing as each other is preposterous (or post-posterous, if you will), and that's what offends our sensibilities so much with the "inflammable" case.

I found a similar, but not identical situation. If we say something is valuable, it would be reasonable to assume that "invaluable" would mean the opposite. However, that couldn't be farther from accuracy. Somehow, I know not how, it's come to mean even more valuable than "valuable."

So far, we've seen the prefix "in" having three different meanings: the opposite of the word (invisible), even more so (invaluable), and nothing really at all (inflammable). Thanks to the world-class comedy of "The Three Amigos," I thought of one more. Fortunately this one exists, because the movie wouldn't have had any real premise without it.

In a letter, a desperate woman (Carmen) writes to our three heroes to ask for their help in defeating the neighborhood bad guy, El Guapo. She spits out all sorts of heinous adjectives describing him, but then doesn't have enough money to send that length of telegram. Instead of the many descriptors, they go with "infamous." Los Amigos, who are actors, wrongly think that the "in" there has the same meaning as in "invaluable." Ned (Martin Short) says something to the effect of, "He's not just famous, he infamous." They agree that he must be a big star in Mexico, and hilarity ensues. How would we describe the real meaning of the prefix in that word? "In a bad way" doesn't really hit it. Any thoughts?

So that's four very different meanings of the prefix "in." I know I may have lost half of you a while ago, but I'm hoping those of you still with me find this somewhat interesting. I do, at least, but I suppose that's a big part of what makes me me.

Huh, that's interesting. I was just about to start the next line with the word "regardless," which made me think (uh oh). Irregardless means the same thing, right? There's another prefix that can mean the opposite ("irrational," for example) but instead means absolutely nothing. I guess I can now say, "Yep, flammable and inflammable mean the same thing. Just like duh and no duh and regardless and irregardless." Cool. I love expanding my repertoire. And you can't spell "repertoire" without Peter, after all.

This post has led me to three final thoughts that I have:

1. It must be so incredibly difficult to learn English.

2. Why would anyone use "inflammable" or "irregardless" unless they like using meaningless syllables?

3. Does anyone else find this stuff even remotely interesting?

That's that for now, gentle readers. I actually have more word stuff that I was going to write all about, but the "in" thing turned into a post on its own. I'm leaving for a conference in San Diego today through Friday, but I'll make sure you get your daily dose of UOPTA. Fear not. Please remember to write to ptklein@gmail.com with anything about anything, for this week's FUF is still wide open (due to the lack of emails currently gracing my inbox). Irregardless, I hope you have learned invaluable life lessons today.